Man calls 911 to say wife stole his cocaine

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A man who called 911 late Wednesday night from his Westwood Avenue apartment just wanted to tattle on his wife for stealing his cocaine, Stark County Jail records said.

He told arriving police that there was no emergency.

“(He) called 911 because he claimed that his wife stole his cocaine,” the jail records said.

Police responded with an arrest.

But it wasn’t his wife.

The 39-year-old man had been wanted on an unrelated warrant charging him with driving under suspension. He also had a glass pipe that he told officers he uses to smoke marijuana, the jail records said.

Police arrested him on the warrant and on charges of misuse of 911 and drug paraphernalia possession. All of the charges against him are misdemeanors. The Repository does not typically name misdemeanor crime suspects.

The man was booked into the jail and released early Thursday pending a hearing in Alliance Municipal Court.

The records did not say whether the reportedly pilfered cocaine was recovered.

Japanese Man Invents Creepy Talking Girlfriend Pillow

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vd-7A proper anime character huggy pillow seems to have become a critical component of the full fetish and fantasy regalia of a well-rounded otaku, but there are certain things you just can’t do with such a 2-D crush. Sure, anime girl pillows will let you squeeze them and passionately insert your sweet nothings into their non-existent eardrums, but no matter how fervently romantic you become, you can’t expect any sort of pillow talk from your pillow.

Unless, that is, you’re curled up beneath the sheets with the Ita-Supo, the first talkinghuggy pillow that responds to your touch with verbal responses, including angry outbursts if you get too grabby.

Developer Koichi Uchimura used to be a researcher at Kyushu Institute of Technology. While we’re not sure what precise field of academia he was involved with at the Fukuoka Prefecture university, his current mission in life is developing new technologies with which to “support people’s otaku life.”

 

vd-4No stranger to the allures of anime huggy pillows, or dakimakura, as they’re called in Japanese, Uchimura nonetheless was feeling unfulfilled. “When we’d sleep in the same bed, I’d start to think, ‘I wish she could talk,’ so I wanted to make that a reality.” The result was Rina Makuraba, whose family name is a pun on makura, the Japanese word for pillow.

 

 

The Ita-Supo isn’t as rudimentary as a button-activated speaker inside a pillowcase, though. As Uchimura explains in the product’s introductory video, “If you don’t rub her, she won’t make any sounds. You have to rub her.”

You can probably already see where this is going: straight to the breasts, which in this instance are accompanied by Rina meowing like a pleased kitty cat…

 

…followed by an excursion in Crotchland, which elicits a breathy, “No, not there,” but capped with a telltale heart mark to show she’s being coquettishly consensual.

 

“For otaku, this is the dakimakura of their dreams,” asserts Uchimura. But while that claim might make you imagine that Rina will let you do whatever you want with her, that’s actually not how the system works.

As shown in the video, the sensor responds differently to different kinds of stroking. Mash your palm over Rina’s chest, and she’ll get upset, saying, “Hey, that hurts!” and “Hey, hands off!” Uchimura even alludes to a cumulative effect, where a continual lack of gentleness will put Rina in such a bad mood she’ll stop talking to you altogether.

On the other hand, a smoother, more measured groping will instead produce a string of increasingly positive reactions.

Otaku who’re worried about a limited phrase set ruining the mood by making it feel like they’re making out with a 1994 Sega Genesis sports game announcer will be pleased to know that the Ita-Supo comes preloaded with over 500 speech patterns. Uchimura says that expansions are also planned, which can be downloaded to your smartphone, then transferred into the pillow.

Despite proudly referring to Rina as his wife in the video, Uchimura seems to have no qualms about sharing, or even selling, his anime spouse, and his campaign on Japanese crowdfunding site Makuake has already raised 302,000 yen (US $2,560) of the 500,000 yen it’s seeking. 20,000 yen will get you your very own touch-responsive dakimakura, featuring either Rina or alternate Ita-Supo stars Shion Kamitsuki and Shiho Natsuki.

If you’re feeling like your bed is both too lonely and too quiet, you can throw some cash at Uchimura. Who knows, if the response is positive enough, maybe for his next project he’ll equip that giant six-meter (19.7-foot) anime dakimakura we saw last month with a megaphone.

Woman divorces husband after 1 week over big manhood

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A newly married woman in Zamfara State, Aisha Dannupawa, caused serious laughter at the Sharia Court sitting in Samaru, Gusau, when she urged the court to dissolve her barely one week old marriage to her husband, Ali Maizinari, because of his mammoth manhood because she could not bear its sheer size.

During the hearing, Dannupawa told the court that she married Maizinari after her fist marriage broke up but that she wanted out of the marriage due to the pains she has been experiencing during sex with her new husband.

Dannupawa who is a mother of three, further narrated that the first time she and Maizinari had sex was a nightmare for her.

“When we had sex for the first time, the experience was a nightmare. Instead of enjoying the sex, it turned out to be something else because his manhood was too big.

After that first time, I had to take medication given to me by my mother.

I told my mother the experience but she told me to endure and that with time, I will be able to cope. She then gave me some drugs.

Two days later, when he came to visit me, we had sex again but the experience was too much to bear.

It was then I knew that I could not continue with the marriage because of the size of his joystick.”

Maizinari did not however deny the accusation and even told the court that he was willing to grant his wife’s prayer for divorce but on the condition that she pays back the dowry and all that he spent on her during the courtship.

When he was asked to state the amount, Maizinari disclosed that what he expected from her was N60,000.

A New Vibrator Lets You FaceTime From Your Vagina (Vagtime?)

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vibe_600Is your current vibrator running low on batteries? We have a new and very high tech suggestion for you: the Svakom Gaga USB Rechargeable Intimate View Endoscopy Vibrator, aka the Svakom Gaga Camera Vibrator, aka the sex selfie stick. We now have a vibe with a built-in camera so you can capture your orgasm from the inside out. (Remember when butt selfies were a big deal? It seems like such an innocent time.)

As the UK’s Independent reports, the vibe uses endoscopy technology, the light-and-camera system that typically doctors use to get a detailed picture of your digestive tract. The HD camera plus the vibe’s insertable length of four inches makes for a crystal clear view of stimulation and vaginal contractions during orgasm. The vibe is waterproof and rechargeable, like that even matters when it has a camera in it. It’s also compatible with FaceTime, so you can share your big moment with friends across the 4G network.

Care for a demonstation of how it works? Of course you do:

The online adult sex toy shop Lovehoney is selling the very 2k15 vibe for $179.99.  According to the video, “It puts the view only gynecologists used to be privy to in your hands.” Who could resist?

Motorist, 21, Arrested After Cops Find His Marijuana Stash Inside Sour Cream Container Labeled “Not Weed”

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notweedcontainerA 21-year-old Nebraska motorist was arrested Saturday night after a cop discovered his marijuana stash inside a plastic container labeled “Not Weed,”police report.

Jordan Meier was traveling with three passengers around 9 PM when a Lancaster County Sheriff’s Office deputy pulled over his 2002 Chevrolet Monte Carlo on a Lincoln street for a traffic violation, according to a police report.

Meier was subsequently “placed into custody for DUI,” investigators noted.

During a post-arrest inventory search of Meier’s vehicle, cops located a 16-ounce plastic container (which once held Land O’Lakes sour cream) under the front passenger seat.

jordanmeierMeier claimed ownership of the container, which–as seen in the above evidence photo–had the words “Not Weed” written in marker on its lid.

But when deputies opened the container, they found more than 11 grams of marijuana inside. As a result, Meier (seen at right) was also cited for pot possession.

In an interview, Meier told TSG that he was on line at a drive-thru Saturday afternoon when he removed a Sharpie marker from his pocket and wrote on the plastic container. Asked why, he replied, “I don’t know…I thought I was being funny. Inside joke with myself, I suppose.” He added, “Never thinking it would be confiscated.”

According to Meier’s Facebook page, he has attended the University of Nebraska-Lincoln and works at a Jimmy John’s sandwich shop.

Booty Drum Lets You Make Music by Twerking

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The Booty Drum is a high-tech musical device that, unlike most instruments, isn’t operated by your hands, but by tour butt cheeks ! All you need to do is attach the drum to your behind, start twerking, and let it transform your movements into beats.

The device was created by headphone brand AIAIAI, in an attempt to give their users some “new music to enjoy on their headphones or  on the dance floor.” They wanted to make a unique music track from scratch, using nothing but body movements. So they teamed up with Portuguese electronic musician Branko, professional dancer Twerk Queen Louise, and OWOW, a Dutch design and technology company to create something really unique. Together, the team took the widely popular twerk dance and converted it into an instrument in its own right.

 

Once firmly attached to the derriere, the Booty Drum records the dancer’s movements via accelerometers. “These movements translate into a lot of unique velocities and directions of movement,” Owow said. “The movements, which are being mapped into unique MIDI values through Arduino hardware and processing software, can in this way be used to trigger samples and create sounds in Ableton. As every single movement sends out a unique set of values, the dancer is able to play around with sounds.”

 

“The project explores the rich heritage of bass-driven club culture where dancing and booty-shaking are integral elements,” the makers further explained. “We want to see if it’s possible to change the perception of twerking through placing it in a technology-driven, creative context and letting the dance do the talking.”

China Uses Plastic Prints to Make City Appear Greener

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Many big cities are now known for being polluted and lacking much greenery.  All one typically sees are tall buildings, lots of people, and hundreds of cars in the streets.

Ik6Hfz3-500x311In China’s Jilin Province, however, the local government has found a solution to make the city look alive again.

Instead of planting trees, workers have installed plastic sheets along sidewalks showing fake greenery to depict a fresh-looking city.

 

It’s quite ironic because greening is supposed to make the city less polluted. Using plastic might just contribute to more damage, especially if it is not properly maintained.